Imaginary New Year’s Eve for Homme

Someone I refer (worringly) a lot to over the festive period once sang these words. All together now:

When I was young my father said
“Son I have something to say”
And what he told me I’ll never forget
Until my dyin’ day.
He said “Son you are a bachelor boy
And that’s the way to stay.
Son, you be a bachelor boy until your dyin’ day

Yes, it’s Cliff the Richard again. The staple of the British Christmas. Anyway, to get back to the matter in hand – this song is the inspiration behind the latest and last imaginary outfit of this year. Oh don’t be sad, just wait to see some of the New Years treats I have lined up my sleeves. We might not have any money come Jan, but what the heck? We can still dream.

Cool Your Jets

Some people are naturally equipped to deal with heat, others do not have this God-given facility. I am one of the latter. When it gets hot, I am perpetually melting. The only place where I become human once more is beneath a cold shower or in a lovingly air-conditioned building. When humidity strikes, and neither of these two options are available I am doomed.

The only possible solution to this scenario is to combat heat with devilishly nice clothes. Breezy lightwear is essential for the melting months, and though the oppressive warmth might make you feel like you need to look like a troll, the opposite is true.

Notes from Paris Deux: Rollers that don’t curl your hair

Along with a string of onions, the male in the roll neck sweater has ‘Je suis French’ written all over it. The festive season, like the Parisian man’s sweater, is all about the roll. Sausage rolls, rolls of wrapping paper, paper hats with bad jokes rolled up inside crackers, and then there’s the festive Yule … Read more

Getting Chunky with Knitwear

During the winter months it is natural to crave hot puddings and custard. It’s Mother Nature’s way of helping you to form a flab layer, keeping in all that fatty extra warmth in during those cold days. Just like the birds of the sky above who munch on seeded balls of fat to chub-up for … Read more

Posh Suits You

It’s time to have a thorough cleanse of any residual laid-back-summer-festival scum. Yes that means wash and comb your hair, use soap, cut off those greying Glastonbury wristbands and have a good scrub because it’s time to get posh. The big-screen remake of Evelyn Waugh’s novel ‘Brideshead Revisited’ has inspired fashion designers to bring out … Read more

Real Man!

Us girls in the office do tend to bore the men with fake tan, gossip and frocks, so to keep the testosterone balance, we have our alpha male of the office, Stephan! He is often quoted as saying the things he does/eats/wears/watches are ‘real man sh*t’! I couldn’t help notice a fellow holidaymaker at Gatwick … Read more